New terms for talking about sex

It bothers me how hard it is to speak clearly about some aspects of sexual behavior and responses using the words currently available to us in the English language.  A lot of our common sexual terms are overloaded with different, sometimes conflicting meanings, and this can cause quite a bit of confusion about what's going on.  Remember, for example, how President Clinton thought a blow-job might not really qualify as being "sex" because it didn't involve vaginal penetration?

Consider the word, masturbate.  According to the Oxford English Dictionary, its derivation most likely gives it a base meaning of "to arouse the penis," or possibly, but less likely, "to defile by hand."  With very uncharacteristic brevity and inaccuracy, the OED defines the word using a single phrase: "To practice self-abuse" — Wow!  Even in 1933, serious scholarship could still be corrupted by superstitious phobias.

In current usage, "masturbate" can mean several quite different things:

• Sex alone.  Masturbation is often used to mean having sex by yourself, without anyone else present. 
• Stimulating yourself.  Masturbation can also mean that you are the one stimulating yourself, whether you're with someone else or not.  In this sense, people can be said to "masturbate" in front of each other. 
• Using your hands.  Some people refer to any kind of hand job as masturbation — in this sense, if you stimulate someone else's genitals with your hands, you are "masturbating" them. 
• Fantasy sex.  This is the kind of sex in which you're primarily focused on an inner fantasy of your own, and relate to everything around you in terms of that fantasy. 

Unambiguous terminology would make it so much easier to speak (and think) clearly about sex.  With this in mind, I'd like to propose some new or non-standard terms in the next several pages, both to capture the different meanings of "masturbate" and to create specific expressions that might help us make new distinctions as well.